I know this truly has nothing to do with security. However now that I have been writing this column for years, and you are all family, I thought I would share this little thought, insight, blurb or whatever ya wanna call it, with you.
I was reading my stars in a VERY predominant Sunday newspaper, coffee in hand and very relaxed on the back lounge and my stars read “You won the lottery the moment you arrived on this planet.” I must have missed that memo/email when I came out of my mother’s womb, because the last time I looked I had $4.50 in my wallet and an inflated mortgage.
The next line then read that I have managed to manifest myself in this world as a human? The writer must be like Albert Einstein because what the hell else would I come out as? A cat, dog, grasshopper perhaps? I was going to continue on, however I considered sticking a fork in my eye might be more entertaining.
I was driving late the other night and noticed all of these weird and wonderful number plates getting around now. What a great idea I said to myself, actually personalising plates to the point of looking like someone had vomited over them.
Oh, the kaleidoscope of colours, leopard prints and mismatched coloured plates and all that stuff going on, all you need is dancing girls and vivid Sydney lights and you’re right to go.
I noticed one tiny flaw in them, however -ummmm you can’t see the numbers and letters on some of them. Maybe at certain angles you may (if you twist your neck sideways and stand on your head maybe)
but straight on, no hope in hell.
“Who cares,” I hear you all scream, well yes, however the next time a cop asks me what the rego was on a particular vehicle that may have done something wrong, I will say “I dunno? but according to the personalised plates they are Rabbitoh supporters, with a twist of fluro pink flowers in leopard print and blue letters ending in J. I Think?”
Have had a number of calls about break and enters lately while the people are still inside the house.
It seriously amazes me how many people say, “I was gunna, I shudda and I woulda, do something out the security on their house.” It is not about spending millions on dogs, cameras, fortress walls, armed guards and Pol Air hovering over your house.
It’s about using common sense, the old C word – Common sense, costs nothing and comes in sealed packs with an expiry date.
Lock it, Lock it, Lock it…. And what do they all say? “Its insured but I hate the feeling of knowing that someone was in my house going through my stuff” and “I feel dirty.” There is a line there, but I think I will leave it at that…
Went to a house that had a break in the other week, lovely BIG house (swing a cat and a jet plane). You know those lovely glass panels next to the front door with the lovely designs ( yes I hear the angels singing now) well that is how they got in. Smashed the panel and opened the front door up, the house had an alarm, but you know, busy day. Kids were crazy, running late, hubby was supposed to do it, forgot the alarm blah blah blah, was going to get deadlocks and was on the to do list. Yep I’ve heard it all before. Guys, its not rocket science, think about it, there are so many links on the website to help you with cheap ways to secure a house. It still amazes me how people are still reactive rather than proactive when it comes to the security of houses and cars and business.
Yet other materialistic objects get precedence (See, I can use big words that don’t mean much and make me look like I know what I am talking about). So there you have it kids, I can write meaningless crap too, my stars next week will tell me that I am really an alien, and I was dropped on my head at birth from a spaceship, can’t wait for that …sigh.
They will bring out musical number plates next year that match the colours. Tip: don’t try sticking a fork in your eye. At least I used a hot pink plastic one so when I got to the hospital it matched my pyjamas and check out the web for tips on home and car security.
www.nepeanregionalsecurity.com.au
